{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"The Onion","provider_url":"https:\/\/theonion.com","author_name":"The Onion Staff","author_url":"https:\/\/theonion.com\/author\/theonionstaff\/","title":"High School Band Teacher Spends 85% Of Rehearsal Hammering In Dress Code For Holiday Concert","type":"rich","width":600,"height":338,"html":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"007ys78sF7\"><a href=\"https:\/\/theonion.com\/high-school-band-teacher-spends-85-of-rehearsal-hammer-1819577272\/\">High School Band Teacher Spends 85% Of Rehearsal Hammering In Dress Code For Holiday Concert<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/theonion.com\/high-school-band-teacher-spends-85-of-rehearsal-hammer-1819577272\/embed\/#?secret=007ys78sF7\" width=\"600\" height=\"338\" title=\"&#8220;High School Band Teacher Spends 85% Of Rehearsal Hammering In Dress Code For Holiday Concert&#8221; &#8212; The Onion\" data-secret=\"007ys78sF7\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/theonion.com\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n","thumbnail_url":"https:\/\/theonion.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/sxfyc1kdmfzlhdvl8bfj.jpg?w=1024","thumbnail_width":"1024","thumbnail_height":"1024","description":"SAN JOSE, CA\u2014Emphasizing the importance of his instructions by raising his voice and repeating crucial points, Leland High School band teacher Jeff Amos reportedly spent 85 percent of Friday\u2019s rehearsal hammering in the dress code for the school\u2019s upcoming holiday concert. \u201cIt\u2019s black turtlenecks with full-length sleeves, and they will stay tucked in for the entire time, do I make myself clear?\u201d said the 54-year-old music instructor during a 25-minute aside that stressed how deviations from the protocol, such as wearing sneakers\u2014even the black sneakers that many tried to get away with last year\u2014would land them backstage for the entire performance. \u201cGirls, skirts must be past your knees. And boys, I expect slacks; gray-colored jeans aren\u2019t going to cut it. Under those stage lights, every single person in that auditorium will see you sticking out like a sore thumb. Got it?\u201d At press time, Amos was reportedly keeping everyone in the band room for an extra 10 minutes to drive home how disappointed he would be if, after so many reminders, anyone forgot their Santa hat for the closing performance of \u201cJingle Bell Rock.\u201d"}